Drug Test Congress, Not the Poor


Have ya heard–our congressmen spend 30% to 70% of their time fundraising.  And still they manage to get so much done!  They’ve even passed a budget for two months.  Again.  (And taken away a constitutionally guaranteed right to due process.  Two birds, one stone–see, they’re efficient too. )  You go boys and girls, you go!  Seriously.  Go.  Get the hell out of our lives.  Perhaps it’s time to consider the old Roman practice of decimation for non-performance.  And what would their corporate masters, from whom they extort all that campaign cash, do if their employees slacked off 30% to 70% of the time?  Bingo–they’d be history.  Let us take a page from big business’ playbook and fire the slackers.  Is it just me or is there an irony in how reticent congress is to extend compensation to those who aren’t working, while being grossly overpaid in salaries and benefits for not working?

But they’re not all idle.  Rep. Kingston, one of those great, grandstanding and posturing Georgia legislators, has put forth a bill to require drug testing of anyone who receives unemployment compensation.  Not to be cynical but his motive is probably more self serving than grandstanding.  Somewhere in his campaign cash records is there possibly a big fat wad from drug testing companies?  Because such a bill would guarantee millions in windfall profits to such firms.  (Say, Rep., Kingston, ya wouldn’t by any chance have purchased stock in such a company recently, would ya? )  Just multiply however many people are receiving unemployment times a hundred bucks, and that’s a pretty big return on a campaign donor’s investment.  However lavish, it’s a chicken dinner compared to profits to be reaped.

Why not, since both the folks receiving unemployment compensation and congress are getting paid for not working, require that congressmen and women be drug tested as well?  The professional extortionists–because that’s what all the money grubbing to corporate donors is, extortion of money in return for votes and submitting legislation–should have to pee in a cup and take a breathalyzer test every time they enter their workplace, our publicly owned House and Senate chambers.  Wouldn’t ya just love to see those results?

Our great Florida guv, Rick Scott, evil twin of Valdemort (as noted by Stephen Colbert) made the same rule and I’m pretty sure he and his wife owned a lot of stock in a drug testing company.  Hey, he got that $1.7 billion, with a capital “B” dollar fine for defrauding medicare the old fashioned way.  He earned it!  I’m glad to see that the corrupt U.S. Congress is going to emulate this unindicted governor.  Ya gotta wonder how the CEO of a company that got fined $1.7 billion for financial fraud managed to escape the slammer, no?  But he never even had to hire a defense attorney.  Yay, democracy with a small “d”!  Never forget, when politicians speak of “the little people,”  they ARE the little people.  Small potatoes indeed.

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