Category Archives: skepticism/cynicism

Advice for Assassin Wannabes


While it’s kind of shocking that some idiot in Virginia opened fire on a
bunch of legislators playing baseball, sudden gun battles and maniacs with
weapons blazing are hardly an uncommon occurrence for many Americans.

Now, suddenly, for those lawmakers caught in the crossfire, they get it.
This is what it’s like to have innocent fun turn deadly because some
unrelated third party decides they have a grievance that just has to be
ameliorated by blood sacrifice. This is what it’s like for many inner city
dwellers who have to navigate free fire zones all the time.

One can only hope that, having come so abruptly face to face with mortality,
our congress will clean up its act a bit. Be a bit more civil. Stop the name
calling and hate speech. (Ya could do with a few less conspiracy theories
too, you right wingers.)

And, not to be unsympathetic to all the shooters-to-be out there, but, if ya
feel you just gotta shoot someone–how about starting with yourself?

Tillerson on TV Being Led on Leash by Russian Foreign Minister


So I saw the Russian Foreign Minister on TV with a Putin poodle, AKA
Secretary of State, Rex Tillerson. The Russian thug, Sergey Lavrov,
sneered at the media and copped an attitude then led Tillerson away on his
leash. I guess Tillerson hasn’t been completely trained yet because he was
at heel on the wrong side of Lavrov. Dogs at heel are supposed to walk quietly on
their lead slightly behind the left leg, not the right.

It’s okay Rex, you’ll get fully trained soon enough. Do ya miss your balls?

What an insult to the American people to have the surrogate for Trump’s
Russian master, Putin, treat our media like that in our own country.  I guess
the Russians don’t even need to pretend to be our equals anymore.  (Actually they have never been so in reality, only in their own estimation.)

I wish they’d go ahead and release the pics of Russian hookers peeing on
Trump (ick, no, double ick!) and get it over with.

Remember the book “Advise and Consent” (by Allen Drury) which had the
then-unthinkable premise that Russian agents had infiltrated the highest
levels of American politics and government?  I guess Vladimir Putin read it too.

Can you say “President Pence”? C’mon Congress, get on with the
impeachment. It’s not as if you’re busy doing anything except being on
vacation and dodging pissed off constituents.

BTW, where does the Tea Party stand on having our president bowing and
scraping to a damn brutal dictator, formerly head of the KGB?  What’s that
sound I hear? Why it’s scumbag Joseph McCarthy spinning in his grave.  (Which is actually a good thing.)

Remember that old book “None Dare Call It Treason” by some ultra right winger John Stormer?  It seemed ludicrous  back in the day.  Now, not so much.  People are starting to call Trump’s subservience to Putin treason.  For a reason.

Will Trump’s Castrati–His Male Appointees–Get Their Balls Back When They Leave W/H?


So I’ve been wondering–will all the Trump administration’s neutered
males–Priebus, Mattis, Kelly, Tillerson, Spicer, et. al.–get their balls back
after they leave office?  (Okay, Spicer and Priebus probably never had any,
but what about the rest?)  And where are those testicles stored anyway?  (Al
Gore’s lockbox?)  Or were they just thrown out with the rest of the trash?

Granted, most of the castrati are so old that they probably weren’t using
those balls for much anyway, except possibly to scratch occasionally, for
old times’ sake.  But the way these guys let Trump humiliate them suggests
that whatever manhood they still possessed had to be checked at the
metaphorical door to their new positions, as a condition of employment.

Some of the president’s paid lackeys used to have some pride, sense of self,
and independence.  Now they’re just a sad, pathetic bunch of saluting,
heel-clicking old castrati who have apparently sold their manhood
for–what?

Still, it could be worse. Über sack-shrinker Hillary could have been elected.
Just the sound of her voice is enough to make a red-blooded male’s testicles
ascend to the refuge of their owner’s thorax and huddle behind the ribs in
fear.  There’s no guarantee she would even have hired any manly men anyway.

It’s gonna be a long four years.

A Solution for Arkansas


There’s an obvious solution to Arkansas’ problem finding a humane drug to execute its death row inmates. Jeez, it’s all over the news these days. And it’s one people voluntarily take for their own amusement, so it can’t bee too cruel.

How hard would it be for Arkansas to score some heroin on the street and just use that? Seems like a win, win to me. If taking human life can be considered a “win” that is.

Cheap, easy to obtain, no manufacturers’ complaints, and humane.

No, no, don’t thank me Arkansas. You should have thought of this yourselves.

Trump May Be Channeling Mad Ludwig of Bavaria, But He’s Still Right About a Lot


Now I am neither a Trump fan or hater. But give credit where credit is due.
He’s correct about a lot of things. And the media’s 20% approval rating is in
part a direct result of their inability to admit it.

It seems to me that Trump is nuts but, again, still right about many things.
The first is the way the H-1b guest worker program harms American
workers. I read an article that left me fuming, written by some seemingly
anti-American young woman named Maya Kosoff.
(http://www.vanityfair.com/news/2016/11/could-trump-trigger-a-silicon-val
ley-brain-drain Could Trump Trigger a Silicon Valley Brain Drain?
accessed February 11, 2017)  The premise of her “Vanity Fair Hive” article
is that Trump will cause a tech industry brain drain, that “China and Canada
are already making a play for the high-skilled foreign workers that Donald
Trump wants to keep out.”

Excuse me?  The implication is that American engineers and IT techies are
too stupid to keep Silicon Valley businesses competitive, that somehow the
foreigners who have been given preference over our own countrymen would
cripple our tech industry if they left.  I say, ta ta, buh ‘bye, don’t let the
door hit you in the ass on the way out.  Get lost, you’re putting my
countrymen out of jobs.  Go work in your own country. Oh, that’s right,
you don’t want to live in your own country.

What might really happen is that there’d be a cheapo-brain drain and I’m
good with that.  Our engineers and IT people are as good as any on the
planet. Better, in fact. They (plus, to be fair, foreign-born capitalists living
in America) are the ones who created Microsoft and Apple and any number
of other tech companies. There wouldn’t be a Silicon Valley tech industry
without American ingenuity, expertise and entrepreneurship. Our workers are
just not as cheap as foreign guest workers. The big multi-national
corporations in Silicon Valley only hire these foreigners because they’re
cheaper than Americans, not better.

I have a truly brilliant friend, a disabled army vet, no less, who had a good
job designing communications software–really cutting edge stuff.  He loved
his job and was good at it.  His job was “eliminated” and then re-created so a foreign guest worker could take it.  It ruined his family and made him almost unemployable, unless he wants to move his whole family somewhere else from Atlanta where he was married, his children were born, where he and my oldest friend, his wife, have lived for 40 years or so.  To paraphrase Trump, our country has been robbed of this native son’s productivity and the future fruits of his brilliant and creative mind.  All so some faceless corporation can make a few
extra pennies by hiring a cheap foreigner with no ties whatsoever to America.

Do I hate foreigners? Of course not. But they wouldn’t give me
preferential treatment in their countries and I don’t see why our country
should do so for them. It’s foolish. I say, send Ms. Kosoff to China,
Canada or any of those countries she fears might take away our foreign
workers.  Drain her brain right the hell out of here.  We’ve got plenty of
writers who are unemployed. They could have her job.

Another thing Trump has right is that the European Union (EU) is not a true
democracy.  Did any European country’s voters cast a single vote for the
president of the European Commission (EC)–the executive branch of the
EU–Jean-Claude Juncker?  No.  Because there was no such vote.  He was
elected to rule 500 million plus people in a landslide–26 to 2–by his fellow
EC commissioners. Which commissioners are pledged to represent the
collective interests of all 28 EU countries over their own homeland.  No
kidding!

Juncker’s reportedly a drunk, and his highest office prior to being given the
job as the head of 28 countries, was as prime minister of friggin’
Luxembourg, a tiny country of fewer than six hundred thousand people.
‘Ol Jean-Claude starts his day pelting down malt whiskey.  Nobody elected
him, and I don’t recall seeing any vote by those 500 million people Juncker
now rules approving Brussels as the capital of Europe either. There’s no
democracy, there was a bloodless coup of a bunch of countries by a handful
of faceless, un-elected bureaucrats. And nobody noticed that ain’t democracy.

As I’ve mentioned elsewhere, when Trump was blasted by the “we hate
America and you should too” liberal media for saying that there were a lot
of criminals coming across the border from Mexico, he was only repeating
what that very same media had been saying for years. Illegal immigration is
fraught with peril and there are a lot of dangerous criminals involved in that
traffic.  According to media, terrible things happen to those folks trying to
get into America. When the media says it, it’s okay, but when Trump says
it, well, they go all chicken little on us. Trembling with fear they scream
that the sky is falling.  I say take some vitamins, eat a few burgers and maybe
your blood will turn red again instead of its current anemic “I surrender”
white.

Trump is really, really, really right about the disastrous trade deals America
has agreed to, starting with the horrible deal George H.W. Bush’s trade
representative, Carla Hills negotiated–the North American Free Trade
Agreement (NAFTA). NAFTA pretty much killed Florida’s tomato
growing agricultural sector. The Mexican peso was manipulated to fall,
which made American products more expensive as a result. Tomato imports
to the USA increased 60% in one year, (from “The North American Free
Trade Agreement and U.S. Agriculture”;
https://www.ces.ncsu.edu/depts/agecon/trade/nine.html accessed February
11, 2017).

When Bill Clinton signed the General Agreement on Trade and
Tariffs (GATT) in 1993, he bitch slapped American workers and damaged
the U.S. economy terribly.  How?  Well,  we, as a country, have enacted all sorts of worker and environmental protections–because we value those people and things–and that makes American labor and products expensive. These trade agreements made American workers have to compete against places where workers are virtual slaves or at least seriously mistreated and grossly underpaid. The agreements totally f–ked our workers.  You know, the ones who made our
economy the greatest in the world in the first place, who built us up from a
backwater to a powerhouse.  Thanks, Bill Clinton, you perv.  I wish you’d spent
more time chasing interns and left our worker and product protections in
place.

But of course media-istas today are so busy thinking with their
emotions that they can’t spare the time, energy and mental discipline it
would take to understand basic economics or any other technically complex
issues. When Trump said once, (I forget the venue) to a journalist that
China manipulates its currency which makes our products less competitive
that bimbo looked like a deer in the headlights. She had no idea what
manipulating currency was or how it relates to the economies of other
countries which don’t do that.

Oh yeah, and screw you Ms. Kosoff.  To reiterate, go grace China, or
Canada–or whatever foreign country you think we might bleed foreign
workers to–with your presence. Please.  Your job is one I’d love to see go
offshore, right along with you.

Hey, You GOP Old Farts–It’s Not the 1950’s Anymore


So GOP senate majority leader Mitch McConnell wouldn’t let Sen.
Elizabeth Warren read something into the record during the senate debate
on racist Jeff Sessions’ confirmation as Attorney General.  Of course, male
senators were allowed to read the same document–a Coretta Scott King
letter–without being shushed.  Now everyone’s outraged.

Shame on you people!  Everybody knows women have no business
speaking about politics in the presence of men.  It’s about time women
re-learned their place.  Haven’t you heard Kinky Friedman’s song Get
Your Biscuits in the Oven and Your Buns in the Bed?

Didn’t you outraged people see the 1956 movie “Giant” with Elizabeth Taylor and Rock Hudson as husband and wife?  In the movie Taylor’s character, Leslie, is from Virginia and used to discussing politics.  When she marries a rich Texas rancher, she finds out what happens to women who don’t know their place.

There’s a scene where she joins–or tries to–the men in a gabfest about politics and everyone is shocked, shocked.  She is dismissed from the room and sent to bed by her knuckle-dragging troglodyte husband.  Yeah, she’s publicly humiliated, by her own husband, for not knowing her place.

But that was back in the ‘50’s.  Most people thought we’d gotten past that
sort of suppression of women.  They apparently haven’t realized–although
it is dawning on them now–that the 1950’s is where most of the old farts in
the GOP hierarchy live.  (That would be the grumpy old fart white guys.)

The GOP must have missed that massive women’s march the day after the
Trump inauguration.  They were probably busy nursing their hangovers and
yelling at kids to get off their lawns.

Ummm, you may have missed something else you surly, contemptible GOP
hierarchy but…brace yourselves…women are allowed to vote.  Yeah, it’s shocking but, calm down, rest a momentm and have another whisky and soda.  It’s earth shattering but, yes, women are actually allowed to vote Que lastima!

We all know you doddering old guys heading up the GOP aren’t not much for critical analytical thinking, preferring kneejerk obedience to someone else rather than thinking for yourselves.  But, just try to connect the dots–both of them. (C’mon, I know you don’t like math but you can do this; it’s only two dots for cryin’ out loud.)  Millions of women marched. Women vote in higher numbers than men.

Do you think women forget grievances? (Husbands and boyfriends, help
the GOP old farts out on this one.)

Are you aware, GOP sexists, that there will be elections in the future?

Can you extrapolate?

EU’s Juncker; Unqualified Clueless Old Fart, Former Prime Minister of Luxembourg!


Why is Britain being slammed for voting for Brexit, for leaving the totally lame EU?  Some more pertinent questions might be:  How did the capital of a pissant little country such as Belgium get to be the capital of Europe anyway, and wasn’t its only previous claim to fame as the overnight stop for Germany whenever it invaded France?   Jeez, Belgium can’t even protect itself, let alone provide and plan for  the security of a whole continent.  Brussels can’t even keep track of terrorists in its own tiny country, so why would anyone expect that they’d do a better job for the whole continent?  As it stands now the EU capital is seemingly awash with terrorists and the numbnuts in charge didn’t even realize it until bombs started going off several terrorist incidents ago.  Yeah, that inspires confidence, no?

And the President of the European Commission, Jean-Claude Juncker?   You know, the old guy with the too-much-alcohol-nose and the snippy attitude, who won’t speak English in the EU anymore?   His previous claim to fame was as the Prime Minister of Luxembourg.  That’s right–Luxembourg!   That’s the country with a massive population of–wait for it–about 556,000 (in 2014) of which 44% are foreigners.  And Juncker gets to run Europe?   No kidding, that’s the resume which supposedly prepared him to manage the affairs of half a billion people.  That’s like telling us in the USA that the Bahamas should rule America and expecting us to hold still for it.

Now why would the UK bitch about this state of affairs?  Gee, one wonders.

Furthermore, in the history of “you can’t make this stuff up” Juncker’s rise to power is even more laughable.  He was in a traffic accident in 1989, apparently suffered a concussion and spent two weeks in a coma.  Immediately upon regaining consciousness he was elected to Luxembourg’s Chamber of Deputies and then promoted to Minister of Finance.  Of Luxembourg!  Hmmm, where have I heard this story before?  Oh, right.  Juncker’s like the character Chance Gardener in the movie “Being There”.   Remember?   The film is about a simpleton gardener, Chance, who corrupt and clueless politicians decide–through a bizarre set of circumstances–to choose as their candidate for President of the United States.  It’s a classic comedy about misplaced power.

How on earth did the continent of Europe become subjugated, voluntarily no less, to someone (Juncker) with flimsy qualifications and a country (Belgium) with similarly threadbare capabilities for running a continent?   It’s ridiculous and the UK is smart to get out while the gettin’ is good.

The financial world and the media, meanwhile, are having a bad case of the vapors (fetch me the smellin’ salts and a mint julep would ya dahlin’ ah feel faint) because a financial powerhouse like the UK decided to bail on this ship of fools.

Yeah.  Our oldest ally is getting pounded because they are practical, because they’d like to manage their own affairs, protect their own borders and determine wherein lies their own self-interest.  Bad Britain, bad.

Sorry, but the EU seems like an old whore–can’t be too picky, and will screw anyone and do anything for a few bucks.

And BTW, to what countries does the EU expect  the UK  to subordinate its own self interest?   Here are a few of the lesser lights:  Greece, Estonia, Latvia, Czech Republic, Lithuania, Luxembourg, Malta, Portugal, Slovenia, Slovakia, Romania, Poland.  Nice countries to visit but would you really want to have your economy and security dependent upon them?  Don’t forget, EU membership means that anyone from these member countries can cross into the UK without being vetted, can secure employment, and, basically, be a citizen.

And guess who’s up next.  Serbia and Albania.  Not exactly beacons of human rights, peace, financial probity or stability, eh?

Yeah, America, how would you like that?  What could go wrong?  So give it a rest.  There are some things that are worth more than money, although I think big corporations may have bribed Congress to make saying so against the law.