Tag Archives: current issues

Told Ya So–Bannon’s a Loser


The December 12, 2017 election results in Alabama confirm what I’ve already said. Steve Bannon’s a ridiculous figure.  Snoopy  sitting atop his little dog house with his weapons in his hands, fighting aerial battles with imaginary German biplanes is a perfect image for Bannon.

He’s Deputy Barney Fife, fumbling for the bullet the real sheriff only allows him to carry in his shirt pocket, so inept and prone to misfiring his weapon is he.  Barney was prone to hyperbole and ludicrous conspiracy theories too, just as the strutting Bannon is when performing his patronizing jester routine before a crowd.

He’s F Troop not the Light Brigade.  Or as someone other than I also observed recently, he looks like some disheveled old drunk who wanders in off the street , onto the stage, and starts ranting about whatever goes on in drunks’ heads.

He’s no Machiavelli, just a pathetic old fat man who appears to drink way too much and is reportedly a wholly owned subsidiary of some gazillionaire named Mercer.

It’s time for Bannon to go back to what I think is an appropriate ecological niche for a man of his talents.  He should be organizing bum fights under some overpass or bridge.

Charge spectators a quarter apiece Mr. Bannon.  That’s the going rate for the kind of public spectacle for which you’re suited.  It’ll keep you in cheap wine, even though your political empire has evaporated.

What would Jesus say?  “You’re not planning on entering Dad’s House are ya?  Because he’s not all that into hate speech.  Just sayin’. “

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U.S. Women Seem Too Emotionally Frail for the Workplace


Apparently American women are entirely too weak and emotionally frail for a workplace with men in it.  To borrow a phrase a lawyer on TV used, too many women seem to be emotional hemophiliacs.  Maybe they’re just too fragile to roll with the ups and downs of every day normal life.  Here’s a tip, ladies.  The constitution guarantees you certain rights.  NOT among them is a right to get through life without being offended or insulted.  It happens.  And when it does, you should stop expecting the rest of us to drop everything and purge whatever little thorn is in your side from society as a whole.

Ladies–learn to take care of yourselves.  The rest of us are busy.  If you can’t handle that simple chore, stay home.  Your delicate sensibilities are a pain in the ass.  Grow up.   Toughen up.

The histrionics of young women reporters having the vapors over men stealing a kiss or making a pass are an embarrassment to our gender. And they cheapen the real trauma suffered by victims of genuine sexual assault.   If their psyches are so delicate that they run screaming into the night when a guy makes a crude joke, then they should stay home.   If, like one of the women accusing Roy Moore, they are still sobbing forty years later because “I thought he was going to rape me” that is just ridiculous.  He didn’t.  Forty years is ample time to get over the “trauma”.

That girl could have just learned the lesson that a young woman needs to watch her step around men and simply have been more careful in the future.  I’m not victim blaming here, just saying that, on the scale of horror, a man putting your hand on his dick is just not that bad.  Icky if ya don’t see it coming, but not horrific.

In the first place, you may not like the truth but the fact of the matter is that forty years ago it was not unheard of in the South for 14 year old girls to be sexually active. It’s sad to know that back then being sexually attractive was for many young rural girls the sole bargaining chip in trying to obtain any measure of social power or standing.

When reporter Katie Tur whined about how accusations of Roy Moore’s sexual harassment were “truly horrific” I wanted to throw up!  No, Ms. Tur, they are icky and gross.  But those acts are definitely not “horrific”.

Would you like to know what “truly horrific” is Ms. Tur? It’s a Mayan woman in rural Florida forced into prostitution. She was found by law enforcement bent over in an agricultural field, skirt pulled up, with a pimp charging two bucks apiece to rape her from behind. The Mayan men were lined up for their turn.  There wasn’t even an arrest, the cops just broke it up.  No “witnesses” would testify.

Would you like to know what “truly horrific” is Ms. Tur? It’s a Mayan woman selling her daughters into prostitution in a hellish trailer with no running water, electricity or toilet.  Yeah, that really happened.  Except those probably weren’t her daughters, more likely they were young girls who’d been trafficked.

Would you like to know what “truly horrific” is?  It’s a guy beating the crap out of a woman or young girl because she said “no”.   It’s a guy sticking a knife in a woman or young girl because she wouldn’t have sex with him.  It’s a guy pistol whipping a female for not “putting out”.

Would you like to know what “truly horrific” is? It’s a twelve year old pregnant girl who doesn’t speak Spanish or English, only Kanjobal.  How is she going to report what happened to her when her obscure dialect is incomprehensible and she is never going to learn a language with which she can communicate how this happened?

Would you like to know what “truly horrific” is?  It’s a woman in her thirties, living in a garbage dump and having a child by her 15 year old son.

At Thanksgiving dinner a few days ago my male friends and I, all native Floridians, talked about how, back in the day, the term “jail bait” was a joke. Young girls would try out their newly discovered sexual “wow” power before they realized that some men, once aroused, won’t take no for an answer.

Roy Moore’s a creep but what he is alleged to have done is not horrific, it’s icky. What is horrific about him is that he will not uphold the Constitution, that he seeks to force his religion on the rest of us whether we happen to be Christian or not.  What is horrific about him is that he wrote that women should not be permitted to run for office–another constitutional right he would choose not to exercise.

If every guy who ever made a pass, stole a kiss, or made a stupid joke about groping is going to have to leave his job and society and don sackcloth and ashes, well, there aren’t going to be many men in public life.

What is truly horrific is that there is going to be a fierce backlash when men tire of women castigating, complaining and constantly moving the acceptable behavior bar.  It will come when men realize that, no matter how they try to figure out what is and is not appropriate, American women (s0me of them at least) are never going to be satisfied and will just keep on bitching.

They’re like the fisherman’s wife in the old tale.  No matter what she demanded of a magic fish, when he gave it to her she just came up with another demand.  Finally the fish realized there was no pleasing her and took back all the advantages, social positions and stuff he gave her and she found herself back in her original state, poor and powerless.

Keep it in mind you emotionally frail women.  If you can’t handle the normal, everyday irritations and indignities which life inevitably heaps on everyone now and then, well…just stay home.  Because otherwise you are going to make women unemployable.  No one’s going to give someone a job if it means everyone else perpetually has to walk on eggshells lest women’s delicate psyches be even slightly bruised.

No one invited women into the workplace, they banged down the door to get access to upper echelon jobs.  They wanted a place at the table.  The second they got it, women started bitching and moaning about how they didn’t like the table.

Ladies, stop the witchhunt for males who may have stolen a kiss or made a pass.   Enough with the “zero tolerance” crap.   How about a sense of proportion and letting the crime fit the punishment.

What ever happened to “innocent until proven guilty”?

 

 

Bannon Now Seems More like Snoopy as Red Baron than Barney Fife


So it’s never too late to admit it when you make a mistake. Mea culpa, I made a boo boo when, not long ago I compared that goofball Steve Bannon to Barney Fife of fictional Mayberry, RFD.

But as it turns out, no, Bannon’s way more ridiculous than that.  He’s Snoopy, sitting atop his doghouse, imagining he’s WWI flying ace “the Red Baron”.  When Bannon says he’s got his weapons back in his hands, it’s too funny.  I imagine Bannon with that bright red nose–and we all know where that comes from–like Rudolph’s, leading the imaginary charge, guns blazing, peering intently from atop  his little doghouse.

Those aren’t weapons, it’s just your limp dick you’re holding there, Bub.  Where’s the juggernaut that was supposed to sweep Bannon’s clients, like a backwards tsunami, into elective offices in Virginia and elsewhere a few weeks ago?  Oh, that’s right–it was a no-show.

Someone please tell Bannon he’s a laughingstock.  When he gets in front of the cameras, capering like a fool it is pathetic.  It’s like the ravings of your aged drunk uncle.

Don’t forget, the Charlottesville Statement, to which Breitbart, Bannon, et. al. bend their reverent collective knees, was written by a pagan, goat-blood-drinking, Florida lawyer/senate candidate.  Just sayin’.

C’mon white guys, I know you’re mad.  It’s been a rough few decades for you all to adjust to, and you’re still pouting about having to share power.  But who wrote all the rules in the first place?  Yeah.  White guys.  You did it to yourselves.  Now you have to share power.  No more unilateral decision-making.

But don’t follow this goofball.  He’s no “leader”.  He’s some rich dude’s paid butt boy.  Some gazillionaire named Mercer is said to own Bannon lock, stock and barrel.  That’s not a leader.  He’s the Grima Wormtongue of the GOP and it’s just a matter of time before everyone realizes it.

And he doesn’t give a rat’s ass about middle class white men other than what he can get them to do for his rich owner.

You deserve better.  Much better.

Next Trump Distraction? Release of Area 51 Aliens’ Bodies


What else can Trump do to ramp up the distract-everyone-from-his-multiple-shortcomings full court press the White House has been pushing lately, with ever more hysteria.  Reportedly, a couple of days ago he was wailing for the GOP to “do something” to save him.  (Perhaps his repeated and unprovoked attacks on prominent GOP senators and House representatives weren’t the best way to win friends and influence people on the Hill.)

Seriously?  Trotting out the more than half century old JFK conspiracy spectres just in time for Halloween has a certain air of desperation about it.  That’s the best argument they can advance for dropping all Trump investigations?  Oh boy.

Well, there’s only one kind of red meat conspiracy buffs like more than re-hashing who killed JFK.

Yep.  Release the hounds Mr. Trump.  Bring out the big guns.  Promise to give up the alien bodies and spacecraft currently being housed at Area 51.

So what if they don’t exist.  Breitbart, Bannon, Spencer et. al. would not be able to resist that honeypot.  The media in general would waste no telling how much time tut-tutting about it, while the far right might be tempted to crow over being, once again, proven correct.  That should take up plenty of the public discourse oxygen for awhile.

And, of course, at the last minute Trump can just do what he always does–fail to produce the body.  Nope, there’s no habeus corpus for our president’s “no veracity zone”.

So it seems that Mr, Trump’s growing ever more frantic to evade the Mueller investigation and protect his Russian masters must mean something.  Jeez his administration has even refused to implement the Russian sanctions Trump himself signed into law not so long ago, so he wouldn’t want anyone noticing that now, would he?

In the past week or ten days we’re again bored to hear more blah, blah, blah about how everything that ever happened is Hillary Clinton’s fault. And that the Russian investigation is over anyway, and everyone agrees there was no collusion on Trump’s part.

Speaking of Clinton, that’s another Trump distraction topic that’s more than worn out its welcome.  Forget Hillary’s damn e-mails.  She lost.  The point is moot.  Whatever she did or did not do, it has no bearing on the fact that Trump seems to be part of a Russian cabal that’s taken over the executive branch of our government.  She’s already been investigated.  Besides, whatever deal Loretta Lynch made with Bill Clinton back when they ditched their security details and got together to discuss their grandchildren (yeah, right) on one or the other’s plane–I forget which–is already in place.

So, enough with Hillary, JFK, the DNC, etc.  Give us our red meat.

Release the alien bodies Mr. Trump.  Or, at least, say you will so we can then watch the media scrum as Wolf, Brian, Sean, et. al. try to spin that story!

And now that you mention it, has anyone actually checked to be sure Melania doesn’t have gills or something?  Maybe she’s a Putin plant.  In fact, is anyone actually sure that Putin was born of a human woman?   We’re clearly in murky water here.

Corker and Flake–the John Carlos and Tommy Smith of the U.S. Senate


While it might have been predictable that Sen. Jeff Flake would stand up for abused and downtrodden Senators, who would have thought Bob Corker would be be one of the flaming reactionaries?  He seems so, well, non-entity-ish.

The pair strayed into famed Olympic protest territory, channeling those two legendary U.S. track and field athletes, John Carlos and Tommy Smith who gave the Black Power salute (black-gloved clenched fist raised in the air) on the medal stand.  (They were reviled, stripped of their medals, and banned from any further Olympic competition.)

The two disestablishmentarian pols,  Corker and Flake, astoundingly, have now refused to play the capering fool to feather their own congressional nests, opting instead for the high road and retirement.  What could they be thinking?

Regardless, the two Republican Cassandras are now permanently enshrined in my imagination, standing on the first and second place podium slots in their sweats (after doing a Paul Ryan gym workout, of course) white-gloved fists raised in protest, bravely bitching about the unequal treatment they are receiving at the hands of the executive branch.

Good for them.  It’s nice to know that there are some things too low even for a Senator.  Such as what they’d have to do to get elected as a GOP candidate in 2018.

 

Ack, Sen. Corker Agrees with Me re: Trump Castrating Cabinet


Except I said it first.  Sen. Corker, you’re stealin’ my premise. (This is just an updated previous post from 4/27/17 in which I raised the same issue–Trump’s neutered males). Because the way the men in the Trump adminstration are publicly scolded, badmouthed, slimed, denigrated, taunted and generally disrespected by their incompetent and embarrassingly ill-behaved master would only be tolerated by someone with no balls.

So I’ve been wondering–will all the Trump administration’s neutered
males–Priebus, Sessions, Mattis, Pence, Tillerson, Spicer, et. al.–get their balls back after they leave office? (Okay, Spicer and Priebus probably never had any, but what about the rest?  They were once high testosterone males.) And where are those testicles stored anyway? (Al Gore’s lockbox?) Or were they just thrown out with the rest of the trash?

Granted, most of the castrati are so old that they probably weren’t using
those balls for much anyway, except possibly to scratch occasionally, for
old times’ sake. But the way these guys let Trump humiliate them suggests
that whatever manhood they still possessed had to be checked at the
metaphorical door to their new positions, as a condition of employment.

Some of the president’s paid lackeys used to have some pride, sense of self,
and independence. Now they’re just a sad, pathetic bunch of saluting,
heel-clicking old castrati who have apparently sold their manhood
for–what?

Still, it could be worse. Über sack-shrinker Hillary could have been elected.
Just the sound of her voice is enough to make a red-blooded male’s testicles
ascend to the refuge of their owner’s thorax and huddle behind the ribs in
fear. There’s no guarantee she would even have hired any manly men
anyway.

What would Jesus say?

“You weenies don’t deserve the balls Dad and I gave ya.  You don’t hear about me badmouthing my apostles do ya?  And look what they did to me.”

 

Ireland, UK–the Best Songs for (USA) Hurricane-escaping Are…


Fingers crossed Ireland, Wales, UK, that no one gets hurt by ex-hurricane Ophelia.  (Yeah, I know, Wales is part of the UK, but I think of it as a completely separate place because its history and language are so different.)

As a native Floridian, and someone who lived in the Caribbean for a long time, I have a ton of experience listening to music while evacuating from islands or driving very fast–punctuated by near standstills–on the continent to escape from hurricanes.   It’s a great apocalyptic pastime.  Sort of.

It goes without saying that you gotta listen to music at such a time.

You guys may not have a lot of experience escaping hurricanes, so, here’s my top eight songs which I can attest are great to listen to while running away from an apocalyptic event.  (Not to be a pushy Norteamericano, but, there’s not a lot of time for you folks to be researching the subject just now. You’re supposed to be getting ready for Ophelia.)

8. “River of Dreams” by Billy Joel
7. “Do You Love Me? (Now that I Can Dance)” by The Contours (rock &
roll)
6. “Twist and Shout versions by the Isley Brothers and the Beatles (rock &
roll)
5. “Look De Devil Dey” by Penguin (carnival soca music)
4. “Sympathy for the Devil” by the Rolling Stones (rock & roll)
3. “Walk of Life” by Dire Straits (fusion)
2. “Layla” (the long cut) by Derrick and the Dominoes (rock & roll)
1. “Pressure Drop” (what else?) by the Maytals (reggae); actually just
play the whole soundtrack from the movie “The Harder They
Come” which includes Pressure Drop and a number of other songs that are
nearly as scary-running-away-suitable

Good luck.  Now crank up the volume, step on that accelerator, and get the hell away from that storm!